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About Vantaa

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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Man, nothing beats my little chill spot at the corner of Kivi Lane. It’s smal, maybe evrybody skips it – but not me. There, near a tiny mural, I do my relaxation routines. I love feeling that cool breeze while I recite movie lines. “I’m a loser, babe,” but then I bounce back with Apollo Creed energy: “I must break you!”